Today is summer solstice – and here I am right in the middle of things. I can see myself standing on a hill, dressed in battle robes (holding a big sword), with the light and the dark to either side of me.
I love the pagan symbolism for the solstice: everything feels lit up and intense and pregnant with potential. I know that having left behind the shitawfulness of last year, and the lovely six weeks off to recalibrate has been a gift. Aside from the badness following our impromptu street party to toast Her Maj, I haven’t had a drink all year. I am jammed with energy. I am leaving every day at a reasonable hour, reading at least a book a week. My sleep is deep and sound. We have spent more time in the countryside this year than ever before – drawn to the big sky, fields and woodland outside the M25. I am inhaling fruit and veges and water and cooking simple healthy food. As a consequence I am shedding the last pounds and it feels easy (YAY!). I am learning to trust my intuition because when I question it or analyse it: when I doubt it: thats when I feel tied up in knots. There is such magic in the air around me at the moment, I feel shiny, electric, ready.
In all senses, I feel that my true self, my best self is emerging. And I feel very protective of myself: I want to stay quiet, cocooned, introspective. I am so sensitive to crowds and noise and crave gentle peace. I am hibernating as there is much ahead.
Before the Winter Solstice I will have:
- taken up running again and finished a charity 10km in November
- completed the coaching training I started two years ago because I now feel totally ready for it and I get goosebumps everytime I think about it
- officially become ex-pats with the transfer of our kiwisaver pensions and the sale of our New Zealand properties
- welcomed Sus back to London with an awesome book party (you’ve read it, right?)
- skinny-dipped with the Mungbean on a southern Californian beach
And its taken six months, but I think that my word for this year is ‘clear’.
image taken at noon outside the office